I am dying to know breast attack.

2015/08/11 10:11:24 網誌分類: 生活

11 Aug

        　　In my previous column I wrote about the breast attack on a policeman by 30-year-old Ng Lai-ying during a protest against parallel goods traders last March. Since writing that column I have been waiting and hoping for young women to attack me with their breasts. I am dying to know what it feels like to be attacked by a woman’s breasts. But not a single woman has attacked me with her boobs (slang word for breasts). Last Saturday, many men joined a protest by women against the judge who jailed Ng Lai-ying for three and a half months for her breast attack. The protesters waved bras and some men even wore bras to make the point that a breast is not a weapon.

        　　A breast attack, as I explained in my previous column, is when a woman attacks a person with her breasts. When you are dying to know something, it means you want to or are eager to know it very much. Many people are dying to know if Leung Chun-ying will run for a second term as chief executive. The expression “dying to” can be used in many ways. For example, I am dying to take a very long holiday in Europe but have neither the money nor the time. This means I want very much to take a long holiday in Europe. To wave something means to move your hand and arm back and forth while holding something. People often wave flags at national events.

        　　Some readers sent me emails about my column on breast attacks. They pointed out that the judge had stressed that he jailed Ng Lai-ying for so long because she had falsely accused the policeman she breast-attacked of sexually assaulting her. I know this was the reason why the judge jailed her for three and a half months even though he agreed the breast attack did not hurt the policeman. Instead of waving bras at a protest, women should prove breasts are not weapons by attacking men with their breasts. That’s why I have been waiting to be breast-attacked so I can tell everyone that it does not hurt.

        　　我在上一篇專欄中，寫到三十歲的吳麗英在三月一次反水貨客示威中，以胸襲擊（breast attack）一名警員的事件。自從寫過那篇專欄後，我一直翹首以待，可有年輕女士會用胸部來襲擊我。我好想知道（dying to know）被女人的胸部襲擊到底是何滋味。但沒有任何一位女士以雙乳（boobs，胸部的俚語）來襲擊我。上周六，女人抗議法官因為吳麗英的「胸襲」（breast attack）將之判囚三個半月，許多男人亦有參與那場示威。示威者揮動（waved）胸圍，有些男人甚至戴上胸圍，以說明胸部並非武器。

        　　一如我在上一篇專欄中解釋過，breast attack是指女人以胸部襲擊人。當你dying to know某事，即是你很好奇，想知得要死。許多人都很想知道（dying to know）梁振英會否參選連任特首。習語dying to也可以有多種用法。譬如，I am dying to take a very long holiday in Europe，意思就是我很渴望在歐洲過一個悠長假期，可惜沒有錢也沒有時間。To wave something就是以手揮動某物，人們就常在國家活動上揮舞（wave）旗幟。

        　　有些讀者就著那篇「胸襲」（breast attacks）的專欄傳來電郵。他們指出，法官已經強調，他要將吳麗英判囚這麼久，是因為她誣告那名她胸襲（breast-attacked）的警員非禮她。我知道這是法官判她三個半月監禁的原因，即使他同意那個「胸襲」（breast attack）並沒有真的傷害到警員。如其在示威期間揮動（waving）胸圍，女人不如以胸部襲擊男人，以證明胸部並非武器。因此，我一直等待被胸襲（breast-attacked），好讓我能公告天下，那根本未能損我分毫。

        mickchug@gmail.com

        中譯:七刻

        Michael Chugani 褚簡寧

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